The Adult Mind - Part II

The centerpiece of understanding our self and others

Our Minds -- Until recently, we thought our minds were solidified early in childhood.  Now we recognize that brain and mind development must be understood in terms that reach far beyond the brain's structural changes and early stimulus.  Despite our variations of form and culture, we humans seem to walk an interestingly common pathway.

Curious what milestones we might watch for?   Our children begin with a beautifully innocent but narrow focus (1st order) that moves quickly, we're told, through impulse and self-interests (2nd) to the strange world of more people.

(3rd order) 
The 'Socialized Mind':  You're drawn to aligning yourself with others, living within the available roles, strongly influenced by what you believe others want to hear.  You trust the preferred authority, unlikely to question.   The great fear of the socialized mind is being disapproved by the group, perhaps especially by those whose approval we feel we need.

Not everyone moves on. Approximately half of the adult population settles down in that third order arrangement and rise no further. 

Moving onward though, we enter 4th order thinking, the self-authoring mind.  This is perhaps the destination we were reaching for when we talked about trying to 'find ourselves'. With our identity submerged in a culture of family and classmates and friends, it's difficult to see ourselves distinctly or with any clarity.  I remember; the self-awareness I had envisioned in college took a couple of decades, and everything changed yet again.

(4th order) 
The Self-Authoring Mind: You're able to objectively evaluate the opinions of others against your own.  The result is an independent self-authored identity.  

"Guided by their own internal compass, such a person then becomes subject to his or her own ideology.  These individuals tend to be self-directed, independent thinkers."  

This is where you legitimize yourself, your philosophy, your theology, your reason for being. You've reached for it for so many years; arrival is a peaceful descent into clarity on so many fronts. You find yourself quite comfortable with folks who think differently.

In the course of life, you'll hold the surrounding social context at a distance.   Your concerns will include falling short of your own standards or being managed by others’ expectations.  This is perhaps a return to the clarity of a child's mind.

Approximately 35% of the adult population reach this plateau of development.
  
(5th order) 
The Self-Transforming Mind: This is the highest or perhaps last level of consciousness in Kegan's model, self-aware and able to regard multiple contexts simultaneously and compare them, being wary of any single one.  Your questions would include, “What am I missing?”, “How can my outlook be more inclusive?”

Your concerns would include complacency regarding your own identity or thinking you'd finally “learned it all”.

Less than perhaps 1% of the adult population is at this level of development.  

It's worth noting that Dr. Kegan's model defines stages of mental complexity.  These sequentially mastered stages are not about higher intelligence or IQ, nor are the more complex stages intrinsically “better”.  What they represent are five levels, distinguished by progressively more complex ways of thinking.  The milestones are arbitrary, change is irregular, nonlinear, and multivariate.  Children are often observed running back and forth across these boundaries, as though reaching for something more.  And it is a theory, of course.  

This offers us a fascinating theoretical perspective; perhaps helpful in our efforts to understand one another and ourselves.  

 What have you noticed along the way? 

• The question concluding The Adult Mind - Part I was, "If we weren't worried about profits and wealth, and about coming out on top, would we be different?"  It suggest the common business context is pre-stage-3; and perhaps our business and government leaders alike are just poorly developed preadolescents.  

• So what might it suggest to us as adults when we're told, "except you become like a little child ...."?  
• Is there something we can actually grasp and do with that?  
• Ever heard a 4th order plan and conclusion being laid out by a five year old?  
• I have; it is stunning.  :)
• Essential takeaway: progress is triggered by continued learning!  Study for the rest of your life.  There is so much we don't yet understand.  The greatest hurdle is caring enough about the goal.

Thanks and a hat-tip to psychologist Dr. Robert Kegan.  Building on the work of Jean Piaget, Lawrence Kohlberg, William Perry, and others, Kegan gives us at least a partial view of cognitive development that defines these five stages of mental complexity or “orders of mind”.   

The Adult Mind - Part I

A young boy sees his grandpa-friend, seated on the couch across the crowded room. Eye-contact and smiles are immediate, and he runs excitedly through the obstacle course of people-legs and furniture and throws himself into the waiting arms, laughing and bubbling with stories of his recent bug encounters and preschool adventures.

In western Africa, my friend and his son enjoy a simpler world
than most; love and happiness despite difficult circumstances.

Love and affection, trust and acceptance, sparkling delight in sharing his life; all illustrate for us the child's mind and heart.

Adults have learned that there are more pressing matters. Have I dressed appropriately? Am I interrupting something? Did I remember to lock the car? Will I be received among these folks? I need to go to the grocery store later, and I need to get the leaves raked, and tomorrow is a work day, and I still have Christmas shopping to finish, and the sequester has really messed up my office; I hope I have a job at the end of the year. I need to greet those folks; it's been too long, and it's not comfortable ... and ...

There's perhaps a balance between the freedom of a child's heart and the weight of responsibility an adult carries. The common constraints of adulthood, however, are not the solution. The accumulation of concerns we take upon ourselves far exceed our personal capacity, and anxiety follows along with discouragement, and perhaps despair. We are neither the solution nor the responsible agent as adults. There is a larger world filled with more than we know.

It might be helpful to take advantage of the instruction we're given, even as adults. Don't be anxious over things, we're told. Consider the lilies who don't plant crops or harvest them. The birds too; they model a different thinking. Is there a practical, realistic way to make use of that? Is contentment available?

It's worth our notice; of all the creatures on earth, only one consumes more than it needs. Only one seems obsessed with 'more'.

C.S. Lewis was an interesting fellow as much for himself as for his writings.

Pastor Tim Keller of New York says his wife had always been a huge Lewis fan, “beating me over the head with his books.” At age 12 she wrote to Lewis to tell him she was one of his few fans, and he responded — four times. The last letter from him arrived 11 days before he died.

“I wrote thinking I would console the man and tell him he had at least a few admirers, not knowing he was huge,” she said. “He was so gracious.” 

As with many authors, Lewis’ fame came after his death. But even while he was alive, an estimated 90 percent of his income went to charity.

From his publisher; “There was a level of authenticity. He wasn't flying in jets, or showed signs of getting rich off of his books,” said Mickey Maudlin, senior vice president of HarperOne, who became a Christian by reading Lewis’ “Surprised by Joy” at 21 years old. “I wonder what he might have been tempted to say if he was worried about profits.”

... which brings us back to the child's perspective. If we weren't worried about profits and wealth and coming out on top, would we be different? Would we do our part differently. Can we take the instruction of a loving father and be blessed by living out our lives as he offers?

I tell you the truth, except you change and become like a child, you will not be able to enter that realm for which you search so fervently.

Evangelium

We cannot be reduced to just one aspiration - be it economic or religious, political or ideological.  The truth is that we all aspire to a fullness of life that cannot be easily addressed. 

Who among us cares about only one piece of life. Who has only one need or concern, only one aspiration or one love.

That for which we dare to hope is more than another can offer except perhaps with a great heart and an invitation to walk on from here together. 

Whether it's a political party, a religion's proponent, or a one-subject professor, the simplistic explanations and solutions we're offered are just too small. What you need to do is just:

• the persuaded republican, "vote for ..."
• the persuaded tea partier, "vote against ..."
• the persuaded democrat, fundamentalist, liberal, conservative ...
• the persuaded ecologist, economist, hippie, historian, spiritualist, "follow our rules!"

Such containerized solutions leave us wanting something more, something real. 

What if there were a grander venue, an outer court beyond 'the hall of the mountain king' of our imagination where the veil fades away ...

In her last days, Dr. L. D. Vincent* encountered such a reality and was encouraged as the threads of her life here came together.  Like others before her, she gathered her family and told them about it all with detail and clarity. Several days later, she passed away peacefully.

What pushy politician or professor or rule-maker could offer such a gracious affirmation of life?  Must we wait until the end to know for ourselves? 

That for which we dare to hope is more than another can offer except perhaps with a great heart and an invitation to walk on from here together.  Evangelium vitae - good life news! :) Indeed.

*Dr. L. D. Vincent was my grandmother.  :)
At one-hundred years old, she met Jesus face to face
one evening.  They talked long about life and what
was past and what was yet to be.  She related it
all to her family before she passed just a few
days later.

Real Rights. And Wrongs.

Women are abused by culture in all but a few places and contexts.  You'd expect that to be the case in the lesser developed regions perhaps, but certainly not in the west.  You'll notice the illustration (right) is English only with hits in the half-billion range suggesting the continuance of such thinking.  Disappointing.

I was surprised by differences from country to country.  Working in Africa ...

The surprise:  Working late one night with a couple military officers; they were debating and invited me to cast the deciding vote.  The issue: is it appropriate to beat your wife only when she was disrespectful, or should you do so regularly to keep her in line?  These are good hearted Christian gentlemen, interestingly enough, who struggle with the difference between culture and right.  My answer was hard to receive.

The unexpected:  In another country, men are incredible; strong, hardworking, honest; and the women are equally strong, perhaps even more so.  It so encouraged me to see how well they handled their difficult world.  It's an impressive culture, former Portuguese colony, slavery transshipment center, now a democracy, mostly Catholic, emerging economy, recovering agriculturally, virtually no crime or violence.  Women are respected; they are the voice of the communities and perhaps the nation as well.

The world's first twitter revolution ...

After decades of personal sacrifice by millions for equality and justice, what is it going to take to finish?  The debate is now well instantiated on the world's virtual wall; that is encouraging.  
Perhaps we'll tweet the neanderthals out of power.  

It worked in Egypt.  :)

Jars of Clay

There Are No Ordinary People; 
You Have Never Met a Mere Mortal

C. S. Lewis, from The Weight of Glory 

It may be possible for each to think too much of his own potential glory hereafter; it is hardly possible for him to think too often or too deeply about that of his neighbor.

The load, or weight, or burden of my neighbor’s glory should be laid daily on my back, a load so heavy that only humility can carry it, and the backs of the proud will be broken.

It is a serious thing to live in a society of possible gods and goddesses, to remember that the dullest and most uninteresting person you talk to may one day be a creature which, if you saw it now, you would be strongly tempted to worship, or else a horror and a corruption such as you now meet, if at all, only in a nightmare.

All day long we are, in some degree, helping each other to one or other of these destinations.

It is in the light of these overwhelming possibilities, it is with the awe and circumspection proper to them, that we should conduct all our dealings with one another, all friendships, all loves, all play, all politics.

There are no ordinary people.

You have never talked to a mere mortal.

Nations, cultures, arts, civilization - these are mortal, and their life is to ours as the life of a gnat.

But it is immortals whom we joke with, work with, marry, snub, and exploit—immortal horrors or everlasting splendors.

This does not mean that we are to be perpetually solemn.

We must play.

But our merriment must be of that kind (and it is, in fact, the merriest kind) which exists between people who have, from the outset, taken each other seriously - no flippancy, no superiority, no presumption.

And our charity must be real and costly love, with deep feeling for the sins in spite of which we love the sinner - no mere tolerance or indulgence which parodies love as flippancy parodies merriment.

 Next to the Blessed Sacrament itself, your neighbor is the holiest object presented to your senses.  

In jars of clay.

Macy's Culture?

Culture; what is it? And how come it seems like we're getting beat up by it?

1  cul·ture  noun \ˈkəl-chər\

   : the beliefs, values, traditions, etc., of a society, group, place, or time
   : a particular society that has its own beliefs, ways of life, art, etc.
   : a way of thinking, behaving, or working that exists in a place or organization (such as a business)

Blah, blah, oh wait; a business culture?
   Like when a black man is arrested while shopping in Macy's?^* 
   Because he's black?  And he spent a lot of money?
Obviously, he's a crook.

It has happened more than once recently. The latest was a famous HBO actor; hustled off to jail before they even asked his name. He had bought an expensive watch ... and he was black.  See the latest 'consumer racism' article on CNN here.

The 'shopping while black' issue even has an entry in Wikipedia, for pity's sake.

Culture is made up of things like the arts and music, traditions and customs, language and literature. But the big piece is 'values'. My culture values freedom, equality, opportunity, and justice. Apparently Macy's business culture adds something to the list that you and I can't support.  Racism.  And they have a special agreement with the NYPD to enforce it, if what we're told has been happening is true.

It isn't just Macy's* unconscionable practices that are troubling, of course.  Racial profiling is the underlying issue.  Our culture is still infested with the root of racism.

Today's target is Macy's*, however.  Among the immoral and unethical practices we find in the business world, yours has disgusted millions.  And one.  Me.  No business for you!

*Macy’s, Inc. is 7 West Seventh Street, Cincinnati, Ohio 45202

Do we know what changed?

A less than 1% literacy rate was the world's norm leading up to the 20th century. Language was about the speaking, and writing was useful for just a few.

Even today in an eastern Africa marketplace, folks do quite well with impressive fluency in half a dozen languages or more.  But reading?  Many, perhaps most in some places, cannot.
Trace the change...
Language is about speaking, but the context and substance have changed over the generations.

Books offered a poor substitute for speech.  Lacking the 85% of content that is facial expression, gesture, and tone, books became an interesting art form differentiated from speech.
Theater and performance, followed by movies and television, gave us back those visual elements but without the interaction of face to face conversation.

A lifetime of such input shaped us culturally.  Gone are the evenings where we would relax on the porch talking to neighbors, hours spent together with board games, and long conversations over meals.  Neighborhoods have become just residential areas.

Technology and commercial media have gone wildly beyond the simple speech our grandparents knew.






The tidal wave of social media floods intrusively into every venue.  Twitter was a power-play in the Egyptian uprising, blogging got Malala shot in Pakistan, and Facebook has connected friends that live oceans apart with comfortable conversation on a daily basis if they like.  

Language was once about speaking, but perhaps it's all of us that have changed.  What was once hidden inside of us until we spoke has now become a river down which we float, barely aware of the upheaval that carries us along.  

The complaints about young folks and their constant attention to the internet and social media; they're too late!  The change point is well past.  Welcome to the 21st century.  A teen today consumes more information in a year than an American colonist would have covered in a lifetime.  Or ten.


Social Media & Technology: building on the good and dealing with the fallout; how do we shed the irrelevant baggage and carry forward the good parts of culture, values, and principles?

Day of regret. Or hope!

There will probably come a day for each one of us when we look back.  We'll wonder how we could have been so shallow, so callous to those around us and so uninformed about ourselves.

We should have known.  We had good examples here and there, but we went with our feelings more often than not.  Or we went with the crowd without any worry at all.  And we didn't know; we didn't learn.

Regret would crush us or drive us nuts, it seems, if there were no way out.

The EXIT.  It has to be real, not just wishful or religious.

There is hope; we can learn.  Acknowledging it all and asking forgiveness of those whom we've harmed, repairing the damage where we can.  Learning and turning away from our selfishness and self-centeredness.  Repentance, forgiveness, salvation: all words that describe that for which we hope with a longing that cannot be satisfied short of something real.

Is repentance 'something real' that helps?  It's unlikely that just church membership or ritual that will change us.  Or insulation from real life things.  Or just someone else's nice words telling us that it's OK now.

Perhaps our hope is to find that fire and walk through it.  To emerge cleansed somehow; changed.  Maybe life's real pathway is that fire walk.  If there's no change, it wasn't real.  If my heart isn't undone and remade, I'm the same dirtball I was before.

Repentance, then forgiveness.  And salvation?  The real thing?  Does it really work?

Yes.  And we knew it all along, didn't we.


__________________________________________________

I was watching the movie Deep Impact.  As the world watched an approaching comet that would bring things to an end, folks quickly changed priorities.  Or went nuts.

The important part though, most saw their lives clearly. Some saw their lives and regretted it all, some went back to the one important relationship, and many labored to help even at the cost of their own lives.  I don't tear up for movies.  Usually.

And I'm reminded.  There is a way ... that's good news for us all.