A refuge in time of trouble - Update

Fleeing gang threats of death
against her young son, a mother 
brought her three children from
El Salvador to the U.S.   After 
3000 miles and 3 borders, 
her children were forcibly
taken from her.  It was three
months before they were finally
reunited in Houston. [ref]

Others aren't so lucky.

Headlines for June 2018 - Infants and children are being taken from their parents.  

The problem grows.  Forced separation of children from parents has irreversible impact, of course. Traumatic severity increases with the length of separation and has greater effect on younger children.

Desperate families fleeing for their lives, who've struggle for weeks just to survive, are being harmed further by current policy and practices.  Around 500 children have been forcibly taken from their parents in the last two weeks alone.  

     As of May 2018, DHS reports there are 10,773 unaccompanied children in U.S. detention centers. Even those families arriving legally and requesting asylum have been similarly abused though there are no legal grounds for separating them from their children.  Once separated, children are transferred from DOJ to DHS and processed separately.  There is no organizational support for reunification.
     DOJ reports there are now 76,634 backlogged cases for separated and unaccompanied children.  The numbers are a problem, and understandably, the Border Patrol, ICE, DOJ, and DHS are overwhelmed.  A former Walmart center has been converted to house 1500 boys, tent cities are planned, ....

It's about more than numbers, though; it's about people, children, and unusual cruelty.  
This must change.

And an interesting perspective, there's the problem we see at the border, and then there's the cause ... What are they running from? Is there some way to change things?  

Behind the increasing numbers of refugees:

• Conflicts that cause large refugee outflows, like Somalia and Afghanistan – now in their third and fourth decade respectively, are lasting longer.
• Dramatic new or reignited conflicts and situations of insecurity are occurring more frequently. While today’s largest is Syria, wars have broken out in the past five years in South Sudan, Yemen, Burundi, Ukraine, and the Central African Republic.  Hundreds of thousands have fled widespread gang violence in Central America, from the world’s most murderous countries.
• The rate at which solutions are being found for refugees and internally displaced people has trended downward since the end of the Cold War, leaving a growing number with no place to turn.

18 JUN:  Children arriving at our border are already traumatized by having to flee their homes and the life they knew. Now, they've endured the dangerous 2000+ mile journey, and they've faced things no child should see. They come to us to beg for help. For those then forcibly taken from their parents, the trauma continues and deepens. I cannot imagine so abusing a child, or a parent for that matter. Let's not treat them like pawns in a political contest.

Republican Sen. Lindsey Graham called on the president last week to use his executive authority to end the policy, emphasizing that no legislative action was needed.

"President Trump could stop this policy with a phone call," Graham said on Friday. "I'll go tell him. If you don't like families' being separated, you can tell DHS: 'Stop doing it.'"

20 JUN:  An executive order has ended the forcible separation of children from parents, but 'zero tolerance' remains in effect.  Refugees are still being treated as criminals.

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Part I

You can contribute to the work.  WorldVision.Org accomplishes more than most in providing assistance and addressing underlying causes at the community level.

Synthetic Attraction

             Years ago, someone had the clever idea to establish an amazing new silk industry in the United States, so they brought in gypsy moths to create it.  ~ Dr. Judith Reisman

Instead, they ate our trees. The effects were disastrous. It was time to destroy the moths before they destroyed our forests, but pesticide after pesticide didn’t do the job.

“Finally, somebody came up with the very creative erotic concept… to have synthetic but intense smells of the female moths put into little pellets.” said Reisman.

At mating time, the male gypsy moths would seek after the smell of the female gypsy moths. All around them females were fluttering, waiting to be chosen, but the male gypsy moths would continue to float all around, looking for that perfect mate… and finding no one.

“She’s all over the place, but he is not finding her,” said Reisman.

He didn’t find her, because the natural female scent couldn’t compete with the synthetic lab-created smell they had been exposed to.

Eventually, they couldn’t mate and they died, because that synthetic smell completely obscured the natural scent of females, concluded Reisman. “In essence, that is exactly what has been happening with pornography.”

Dr. Judith Reisman, author, historian and activist, likens the impact of pornography to that of the synthetic scent in that 1960s gypsy moth extermination.

Pornography is a brain-changer; it changes the neurological categorization of sexual stimulation to an independent pursuit of physical pleasure rather than a subordinate part of healthy relationship.
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Note: In 1994, Playboy sued Dutch tv broadcaster EO to demand the retraction of statements by Dr. Reisman. On air, Reisman essentially accused Playboy, Penthouse, and Hustler magazines of producing child pornography, based on the study of three decades of their publications. Playboy lost the lawsuit. In the ruling, Reisman's findings are referred to as: "the uncontested factual findings of Dr. Reisman"

From an introduction to the ConquerSeries 

Living life wrong ...

Things that backfire aren't always understood before the consequences start showing up.

Sex, for example ... moving sexual intimacy outside the boundaries of a healthy relationship is like moving sugar outside of a healthy diet plan.  Imagine hours of consuming just sugar.  It affects you immediately and will eventually ruin your health.
Sexual intimacy in a healthy relationship is a joy, but outside that context, it's just a gratification much like an addictive drug.  It will reshape your behavior, your thought-life, and your future.
Who pays the cost?  You, your family, your children, and your ability to relate to others will suffer.

Do the research yourself.
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Gratification, quick satisfaction of a desire with little regard for cost or consequence ....

E.g., a budget plan puts things in place and priority; food and shelter, health and development, and later years.
Spending outside the plan may be fun, but it's unwise, just gratification.
Spending what you don't have now ... will cost more and will shape your future.
Who pays the cost?  You, your family, your children ....

E.g., a healthy life-plan prioritizes relationships and family, recreation and work, eating and exercise, and future goals.
Binge living, whether consumption or luxury or intoxicants, may be fun, but it's unwise, just gratification.
Spending life on the wrong things ... will have a high cost and will shape your future.
Who pays the cost?  You, your family, your children ....
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Addiction - At some point, repeated behavior focused on pleasure, on quick gratification, becomes compelling, even compulsive like an addiction.   The brain changes, as we now know; it's physically reshaped to focus on progressively more pleasure.  It's a ferocious life-changer.
Who pays the cost?  You, your family, your children ....
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This is from a recent tv ad about  ...  toenail fungus   
...   on multiple  networks, daytime and primetime, 
perhaps the best example recently of 'sex sells'.

Our culture tends to push us off balance.  Sensually framed advertising, sexualized story-lines in popular media, and pornography, all have increased dramatically in recent decades.  Kinsey and Hefner gave us the sexual revolution, commercialized sex, and today's burgeoning porn industry.  The increase in sex trafficking and trafficking children we've seen is perhaps a by-product.  The cost is high and will be higher in years to come.
Moving sex outside the context of a healthy relationship has a price.
Who pays the cost?  You, your family, your children, your culture ....

Do the research yourself.  That's the world we live in; it's an active battleground.   So how do we equip ourselves and fight, and how do we lead our children?

Executive summary: “If we understand sexuality as being first about intimacy, then viewing pornography becomes a voyeuristic invasion of the sacred space of another. Instead of being life-giving, it becomes destructive for the viewer as well as the one involved in its production. It provides a false, or counterfeit, way of feeding the need for intimacy. On a cultural and social level, men and women are portrayed as objects for our consumption. The undeniable message here is that people are pieces of meat for our consuming pleasure and entertainment. If that is how the brain is being forced to respond to these images, the objectification and commoditization of people will seep into other parts of the viewer’s mind. It will affect the way he views people when he is not watching porn. The regular consumer of porn will begin to find that he fantasizes throughout the day about sex. Each woman he sees will be seen through a pornographic lens. People become an object of consumption or a competitor against whom they compare themselves. They will be evaluated as to their stimulating ability. It should come as no surprise that that these consequences can destroy a marriage, family, ministry, or career. While it offers the promise of intimacy and connection, pornography only delivers isolation, disconnectedness, and depravity.”   ~The Conquer Series (coming soon)

Reality vs. Rhetoric

The president admitted he hates taking in refugees. "I guarantee you they are bad." He added, "They are not going to be wonderful people who go on to work for the local milk people."

Actually, refugees are a benefit to America.  A report released in April this year suggests that the dire warnings about those who seek asylum in the United States may be unfounded. In fact, the report indicates, they're helping make America great.  They fill in the gaps in the work force, they get educated, pay taxes, buy homes, make progress, and become part of the American way.  In 2015, for example, refugee income nationwide totaled $77.2 billion and refugees paid $20 billion in taxes, according to the report. 

While vetting all incoming foreign nationals is appropriate, discrimination by race or origin in general has no supportable rationale.  Is racism involved in the decision making we seen?  Of course.  Is there unfounded prejudice?  Absolutely.  "Rapists" from "sh**hole countries", "they're not sending us their best."  Many among us think similarly, unfortunately.

"The US has become a dumping ground for everybody else's problems. Thank you. It's true, and these are the best and the finest. When Mexico sends its people, they're not sending their best. .... They're sending people that have lots of problems, and they're bringing those problems with us. They're bringing drugs. They're bringing crime. They're rapists. And some, I assume, are good people." Objective review and analysis suggest the statement is inaccurate.

These are folks fleeing for their lives; they're not sent by Mexico or anyone else.  Refugee admission limits have been reduced to their lowest level in thirty years.  Families and children are caught in the turmoil.   Is this our best national response, one of conscience and reason?

Photojournalist Steve McCurry commented , "In seeing this current global refugee crisis, it's almost like people in Europe and the US are scared of refugees. Or they simply don't want the burden of hosting them. But we forget none are actually more scared than the refugees themselves. They are forced from their country, their homes."

Conflict, why the stress?

Covert War - decade seven

My grandfather was born out on the mid-western plains.  He grew up on a farm and married a local girl.  They farmed for a living, and their friends were mostly members of a small church community.  His children were born in the 1920s and were raised through the Great Depression years and the aftermath.  Tough years, tough people; they were farmers, so they didn't starve.

By the time their grandkids showed up, Grandpa and Grandma had sold the farm and moved to the city for a normal middle-class life; regular job, regular home.

As one of the grandkids, I had them to myself for a week or two in the summer, sometimes.  They were really picky about tv shows we'd watch, and I remember wanting them to take me to see 'Exodus' at the movie theater, but they were uneasy about it.  They eventually did, but we had to show up just for the movie and not any previews of anything else.  Why would they do that?

It took a few decades before I connected the dots.  Our culture was changing, and they noticed but I didn't.  They had conscience problems with the entertainment industry and the way relationships were portrayed between men and women.  They had problems with glamorizing and sensualizing women.  They didn't want to think that way, and they didn't want me to, either.

We didn't talk about it.  Folks didn't talk about that sort of thing with any clarity back then.  It wasn't until the 1980s that we began to study healthy sexual behavior and its compulsive variants.

"The modern western society in which we live is slowly but surely conditioning women and men – children or adults – to a world where whatever we desire must be available for immediate acquisition. ...  In this context, one that would rather ignore the feelings of frustration associated with abstinence, sexual behavior has also known an evolution in which the laws of supply and demand have come to reign, along with the rules of free competition, giving to ‘sex’ objects the same status as any other product. In just a few decades, access to pornography has not only been developed but also became banal. We are far from the censure of the early 20th century when kissing scenes were simply cut from cinematographic reels. Consumer studies show that on Google, the world’s number one search motor, the terms ‘sex’, ‘love’, ‘porn’ arrive at the fore of all requests by both type and nature. Sexuality has become recreational, and even imperative. In effect, it was as if the slogan of the new societal Super-ego had become: ‘Unfettered and unlimited pleasure is a must.’"  ~ from the archives of the US National Library of Medicine - National Institutes of Health - Sexual addiction: insights from psychoanalysis and functional neuroimaging.

Culture change was underway in 1930s Hollywood, but aggressive warfare began in 1948.  If you're brave enough, trace the Kinsey Report (Human Sexuality, 1948-53) through Hugh Hefner (who declared he would be Kinsey's pamphleteer and then launched Playboy magazine) and note the removal of relational elements from physical intimacy.  As they've presented it, there is no relationship factor beyond the physical contact event.  No magnificent love, no covenant, nothing.  The decline has been precipitous.  Does that make a difference?  

Newsweek; admitting the obvious in 2011

THE TIME SPENT ON PORNHUB IN 2016 EQUALED 5,245 CENTURIES!

Every year, PornHub (the largest porn website in the world) publishes insightful statistics. In 2016, they racked up 23 billion visits to their site and collectively, 4.6 billion hours.  Porn is just one indicator.  

The war is on, much ground has been lost, and as yet, there is little public awareness of what happened.  For those who care about their own mind and the minds of their children, just standing on the sideline is no longer an option.

Churches are beginning to respond thoughtfully and effectively.  National programs with a history of success are being integrated into church education for men and women.  Talk to a trustworthy elder, get informed, be open and proactive.  The alternative is just being swept along by the changing culture along with our children.
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For a more specific narrative, see Playboy, Polanski, and Sex Trafficking, Dr. Judith Reisman, former principal investigator for the U.S. Department of Justice, Juvenile Justice and Delinquency Prevention study of child sexual abuse and crimes suborned by "soft" pornography, and author.

For the relevant science, see Understanding Sexual Addiction, and note the referenced source material.