One Step Removed

Face to face and familiar; that's the norm for community.  In a community of just a few thousand residents, most days will include regular encounters with friends and acquaintances. Such a community has natural constraints for behavior, manners, family, and business practices.

Just one step removed, anonymity.  In a densely populated region, coming and going commonly occurs without familiar faces.  Those with whom you share the road are just shadow people of no consequence.  We needn't greet them politely or treat them graciously.  If fact, rude words are common, and aggressive maneuvers are frequent, things you'd never do to a friend or a family member.  Why might that be?

In one small west African country, everyone knows everyone and their parents and siblings and cousins.  There is no anonymity, and consequently, little misbehavior and no particular crime to worry about.  Children run free and everyone watches out for them.  Extended families are close, and they depend on each other.  Only a few have extracted themselves from the culture to pursue wealth and prestige instead of place and belonging.  Most are too intimately tied to one another to stray far.  It's an interesting dynamic; is it preferable?

Apart from poverty and frequently inadequate diet, citizens of this small country are better equipped for life than most in the developed world.  Children are confident, cross-generationally engaged, and knowledgeable about their culture and environment.  They learn essential skills by working alongside their parents and others.  Compared to inner-city children in the U.S., these African children are perhaps fortunate in many ways.

In inner-city Baltimore, most children in one student group had a family member or friend they knew who had died from street violence, most were regularly exposed to the drug culture, most had an unstable home life.  Those issues are minimal or nonexistent in this one African community.  Uncommon, perhaps, but instructive.

Despite my poor grasp of their language, they patiently
educated me in the ways of family, work, and respect.
It took a few years, and there is still so much more.
Every day, I'm thankful to these great folks.

I was a stranger working in their country, and they took me in.  They made a place for me among them and taught me much about the real world.  That reality, more than years of academic pursuit, has opened doors I didn't know were there.

It's easy in our busy lives to remain comfortably narrow in our circle of friends, but should we perhaps deliberately expand to include ... more of the real world?

_______________________________________
Social theory suggests, among other things, that healthy community includes interpersonal engagement, residential proximity, and open area for activities.  It suggests that complex engagement and interaction produces equality, opportunity, advancement, and benefit for most if not all.  
It suggests further that high density population areas tend to decline in all of those categories.  Why might that be?

Love problems

The first problem with love is the tenderness it provokes in us. It can bring an almost overwhelming vulnerability that's like living with a knife in your heart.

The second is the furious strength and crystal clarity required to love well and fully.

The warm affection we feel is just that; a feeling.
The pleasure we experience in their presence is just that; our pleasure.
The joy of spending time together is ours, too, as are the memories.
All that is good, but it isn't the centerpiece.

Egyptian woman kisses a policeman during the

revolution against Mubarak [Egypt, 2011]

What we do and the choices we make, those are at the center of genuine love.  When we choose in the best interest of another, whether it's instructing our child or feeding the hungry, whether it's standing up for the good of others or losing our place because we put someone else first, it's what we do and the choices we make that embody genuine love.

If you care just a little, you'll do a little.

If you love, you'll stay alongside.

Brazilian protester carrying an injured officer

to safety as violence escalates

 [Sao Paulo, Brazil, 2012]

Love is the root of character.  The one who loves truly will serve well and will do so even at personal cost.

Let's not pretend we love one another if we can't get past politics or race or culture.

Strong love is durable, it makes a place for others and has no need to put another down or to insult or do harm.  Strong love is a life-changer, a help-bringer, a world-changer.  It's the light that shines brightest on dark days. It's our greatest offering.

How many?

5

Mongol Conquests

Death Toll Estimate: 60 Million

4

World War 1

Death Toll Estimate: 65 Million

3

World War 2

Death Toll Estimate: 72 Million

2

European Colonization of the Americas

Death Toll Estimate: 100 Million

1

Child mortality by starvation or preventable disease
Death toll estimate: 300 Million+ since 1970

Death by war in the 20th century is estimated at 200+ million.  The death toll from preventable causes among children under age five and just since 1970 exceeds 300 million.  And that is just the children.  The death of each precious child was a great loss to their family.  Across populations, death and suffering from poverty, economic inequality, and disenfranchisement (all unnecessary and addressable) are beyond measure.  Or excuse.

While there are many difficult problems associated with civilization, it's worth remembering that deprivation from generation to generation is not chosen by the victims, it is imposed by governance and sustained by predatory trade and finance.

Seeing the problem perhaps reveals the solution as well.

A refuge in time of trouble

More than half of all refugees are children.  -- 2015
(From the Human Rights Watch - We've not
 been able to locate this child.)

An exhausted child cries on the railway tracks between Serbia and Hungary as night falls.

International response to today's refugee crisis continues to be a volatile issue.  The individuals involved are invisible in our public discussions. 

There are 65 million people who have been forced to flee their homes. The number of refugees in the world has reached the highest level ever recorded, according to the United Nations.

“At sea, a frightening number of refugees and migrants are dying each year.  On land, people fleeing war are finding their way blocked by closed borders.”

UN High Commissioner for Refugees Filippo Grandi
UN Update 11 JUN 17

The reasons are threefold:

• Conflicts that cause large refugee outflows, like Somalia and Afghanistan – now in their third and fourth decade respectively, are lasting longer.
• Dramatic new or reignited conflicts and situations of insecurity are occurring more frequently. While today’s largest is Syria, wars have broken out in the past five years in South Sudan, Yemen, Burundi, Ukraine, and the Central African Republic, while thousands more people have fled raging gang and other violence in Central America.
• The rate at which solutions are being found for refugees and internally displaced people has been on a falling trend since the end of the Cold War, leaving a growing number in limbo.

Update: More than 80 percent of Syrian refugees registered

 in Lebanon are women and children.  July '17

“We’re stuck here. We can’t go on and we can’t go back,” said Hikmat, a Syrian farmer driven from his land by war, now living in tent outside a shopping centre in Lebanon with his wife and young children. “My children need to go to school, they need a future,” he added.

The U.N. found that three countries produce half the world’s international refugees. Syria at 4.9 million, Afghanistan at 2.7 million, and Somalia at 1.1 million together accounted for more than half the refugees under UNHCR’s mandate worldwide.  For national (internally displaced) refugees, the greatest numbers are in Colombia at 6.9 million, Syria at 6.6 million, and Iraq at 4.4 million.

After seven days on the run young

Nyanchau, who is internally 

displaced, chews on the dry

flesh of a palm nut in 

Rumbek, South Sudan.

©  UNHCR - Rocco Nuri

While the spotlight has been on Europe’s challenge to manage more than 1 million refugees and migrants who arrived via the Mediterranean, the U.N. report shows that the vast majority of the world’s refugees were in developing countries in the global south.

Two displaced Yemeni children, Muna, 9 and Swkina 8, stand

outside their family’s tent in the Darwin camp - in Yemen’s

northern province of Amran. © UNHCR - Yahya Arhab

Worldwide, Turkey is the biggest host country, with 2.5 million refugees. Lebanon, with nearly one refugee for every five citizens, hosts more refugees compared to its population than any other country.

Children make up 51% of the world’s refugees, according to the data UNHCR was able to gather (complete demographic data is not always available). Many are separated from their parents or travelling alone.

In light of the extraordinary human crisis, what might be our personal response?  Our national response?

We can help.
Contribute to the work (and here) or perhaps get involved.  WorldVision.Org accomplishes more than most in addressing the underlying causes.

Party time!

Two Parties? Why just two?

In real life, few issues can really be defined by just two sides.  There are often as many sides as there are participants in the discussion.  Pro-lifers and pro-choicers span a spectrum of positions from absolute through various shades of moderation.  Issues of science, conscience, law, culture, and autonomy are worth discussion and understanding, but we're offered instead an either/or. It's the same for taxes, business regulation, economics, the constitution, and foreign relations.

So why is our choice in representation limited to either/or?  The chance of a candidate actually representing my views and yours is rather small.

From the Wikipedia article on U.S. political parties, the 2016 charts shows a bit about your chance of being represented in national and state legislatures.

Political Parties	House of Representatives	Senate
Republican Party	247	54
Democratic Party	186	44
Independent	0	2
Vacant	2	0

Political Parties	State Lower Chamber Seats	State Upper Chamber Seats	Governorships
Republican Party	3,043	1,133	32
Democratic Party	2,344	832	17
Vermont Progressive Party	6	3	0
Libertarian Party	2	2	0
Working Families Party	1	1	0
Conservative Party of New York State	1	0	0
Independence Party of New York	1	0	0
Independent	13	3	1
Vacant	4	3	0
Total	5,411	1,972	50

We've attempted to spin off support for more than just those two extremes, but so far, it's hasn't really made the difference we need.  We've been this way for a long time; did we make the right choice?

Divided, we fall, we're told, and we are a polarized and in many ways divided nation.  I wonder what it would be like if we had half a dozen major parties and a couple dozen significant minor ones.  Would we talk to each other instead of about each other?  Would we find it necessary to discuss and understand?  We'd need collaboration to succeed, I suspect, and compromise.

Could a strict constructionist sit down with a libertarian and a neo-liberal, agree on a goal, and find a path they could support?  Perhaps.  Could they learn from each other?  Sure, if there was an honest dialog.

For now, the D&Rs share the stage, each with a catastrophically narrow view of the nation, the future, and the possibilities.  It makes a difference.

An extraordinary philosopher

A relatively unknown philosopher unveils the centerpiece of human existence.

"Everything that matters is relational," our philosopher explains.

In a detailed analysis of quality-of-life issues, an organizational professional and philosopher detailed the various elements of successful living. Interestingly, when reviewed from the bottom up, there appears to be a baseline threshold above which 'more' of anything makes little difference. Above that threshold, issues like wealth and possessions, luxury and convenience add little to the quality of  life as individuals explain in their own self-evaluation.

A person who lives in poverty is greatly served by rising up to a measure of adequacy for food, shelter, access to employment, education, and healthcare.  Above that line, adding more makes little difference in self-described life-quality.

One factor, however, rises on a continuous path to the very peak of significance.  On a scale of one to ten, we might mark the mentioned baseline threshold at two or three.  That would be enough for a good life, and fancier versions of residence or transportation would make little quality difference.  The one exception, rising to a ten on the scale, is personal relationships.  "Everything that matters is relational," our philosopher explains.

Adventures in travel, success at work, financial milestones, all are of little impact unless they are shared, unless they add to the life of another.  The memorable events of our lives are most often related to folks we love and hope to serve well rather than events involving just places and things.

Real Life:  Not surprisingly, parents and astronauts have a difficult time keeping that in perspective.  For parents, one child is a difficult task.  Two is impossible.  Five is a life-consuming brain and body drain.  There are so many details, particularly in the developed world, that have to be handled; it's hard for mom and dad to get a peaceful moment.  In retrospect, though, the first remembered and best recollections are related to family and especially, the children.  For astronauts, it's probably hard to top a spacewalk.

As for parenting:  the easier version of parenting doesn't appear until the first grandchild arrives.  Then you have the comfortable leisure to enjoy the week-to-week changes in the child.  New facial expressions, developing hand-eye coordination, deepening relationship and love bonding, and fascinating interactions.  Grandfather's have time to enjoy such things while the parents do all the hard work.

My granddaughter, like her mother before her, is the centerpiece of why life is so enjoyable these days.  Happiness springs up at the thought of her company.  She's perhaps not all there is to life, but she's extraordinary.  Of course.

So in the larger view of life, each relational context can add or subtract quality.  Our impact on others, on each individual whose life we can touch, is determined by the quality of the relationship and interaction.  If we do well, they're blessed.

You can be a world changer for that one to whom you have relational access.  Or you can ruin their day/year/decade ...

Knowing this, how might we plan the investment of our lives?  We can choose to be loving, supportive, encouraging, and graciously informative, can we not?  It's practical and active, not feelings, by the way.  And, it's two-way; if we do well, we're both blessed.

The way we relate to others is actually number two on the authoritative list of important understandings.  "Do unto others as you would have them do to you."  Know what the first is?  :)

The photo at the top is my granddaughter, by the way.  We spent the day together, reading books, walking in the sunshine, and a first attempt at assisted tree-climbing.  I'll remember that day forever, but I can't remember a single thing of similar significance from that week (or month) at work.

Thanks and a hat tip to the great philosopher, Tim Frink.

Galatians 5:13Amplified Bible (AMP)

For you, my brothers, were called to freedom; only do not let your freedom become an opportunity for the sinful nature (worldliness, selfishness), but through love [a] serve and seek the best for one another.

[a]Footnote: The key to understanding this and other statements about love is to know that this love (the Greek word agape) is not so much a matter of emotion as it is of doing things for the benefit of another person, that is, having an unselfish concern for another and a willingness to seek the best for them.