The Beauty of Life

Kids cracking up while trying to pose for a picture.  It
was their idea.  In the background, my friend and his
nephew rest in the shade on a warm afternoon.

"The beauty of life depends not only on how happy u r, but how happy others have been bcoz of u!  Hope u had a flowery day.  Bye!"

The text message from a good friend in eastern Africa pretty much made my day.  He and his family made a place for me when I was there years ago, and they'd visited me when I was laid up with broken ribs; they prayed for me and wept as I struggled with the pain. They brought me a gift of special cashews for my final going away, and they never asked for anything.

The family is doing pretty well.  They've built another simple house after having been evicted by government from lands they had lived on for generations.  They all live together - mom, brother, sister, grandma, little fellow, plus nieces and nephews.  Together, they do a small charcoal business in the village.  With a little help, the kids are in school, health issues are addressed, one nephew has finished trade school and internship, ... things are going okay.  We swap texts and stories every few weeks, and sometimes pictures.

In his text message, he was again thanking me for helping out with some simple things.  Our relationship goes both ways.  He and his family have given us so much over the years.  They've taught us about things like faith and working together, loving practically.  And perseverance.  They work all week and their Sunday church service if full of praise and thanksgiving and prayer for each other and for us.  I hope they know what a help they are.

If you'd like to join in, we can provide introductions.  :)

Recentism

Our congressional representatives attempt to block Syrian
refugees (about 10,000 planned) in the queue for
the U.S. as France agrees to accept 30,000.

recentism ‎

• A focus on recent events to the exclusion of history. 

We can be overburdened by present concerns.  Lacking a longer-term perspective, both discussion and decisions may move ahead without consideration of the timeless truths and values available.

The painful turmoil over refugees entering America is perhaps an excellent example.  With political candidates in the queue for national office, the subject opened spillways of excess thought that were released downstream.  Actual facts and objectivity took a while to emerge.  Deeper understanding didn't arrive for weeks, long after the players had flooded the channels with solutions for problems that didn't exist.

Ignored in the flail are the values we claim as a nation.  We will defend the helpless, we will lend a hand to those struggling to survive, we will stand against injustice.  With only a few hiccups along the way, we have long been a haven for refugees.  

Lost in the storm of words and fear ... our backbone?   ... what else is lost?

Update: 2 MAR 16

Shall we build a wall and deport all the foreigners?  If ever there were a time for clarity and values and courage ..., well, this is another one.  


2 MAR 16:  I'm reminded of a playground incident; some bee's nest had been disturbed, and the swarm was chasing us kids.  A couple got stung as we ran to the school entrance.  They wouldn't let us in.  They didn't want us to disturb the teacher's meeting because it was really important.  

We all remember them fondly, of course.

Personal vs. National Economics, & the funniest solution

Doing well with your personal finances is essential.

You have to understand how money and especially how credit and borrowing work.  A relatively conservative approach is perhaps best for the long term.

Spend less than you earn.

Live within your means.

Saving is a big deal.  

Borrowing for consumables is a loser, always.  

Borrowing for a home is usually safe if the price is reasonable, and if you have a plan for maintaining the value of the property.

If you spend fifty years doing things reasonably, you'll likely end up with enough to help your grandkids through college and fund your retirement as well.  Perhaps.  Maybe.  If you can avoid the pitfalls.  That's the conservative approach.  That's personal economics.  

You can do all of that for a lifetime and have it all go south on you.

It's happened before.  Most recently, the housing bubble floated to the top over a couple of decades.  It was fueled by predatory lending practices in the finance industry, and families lost everything in the process.  Not the crooked banks, the families.  

The finance industry passed the loss off by fraudulent resale of the loan risks, fraudulently classified as A+ when they were knowingly just junk.  The SEC, the FED, the banks, the exchanges, and all the players came out on top, and families took the loss.  Various estimates suggest every man, woman, and child in America lost about $16,000, but that's not true.  Nobody on Wall Street lost a penny.  Not a single employee was indicted, not a single CEO lost his multi-million dollar bonus, and the fines that were paid were paid to the government after being taken out of the pockets of the savers who'd been robbed in the first place.  That's the finance industry given to us by conservative politicians.  Unfettered, minimally regulated, free market animals.  Thanks and a hat tip to the conservative approach to finance.

Trump Entertainment Resorts filed for bankruptcy four times, in 1991, 2004, 2009 and 2014.
Trump Entertainment Resorts's only current property is the Trump Taj Mahal in Atlantic City.
The company's former properties include:
Trump Plaza in Atlantic City which was closed in 2014.
Trump 29 in Coachella, California is now the Spotlight 29 Casino.
Trump Casino in Gary, Indiana is now the Majestic Star II.
Trump World's Fair Casino at Trump Plaza was closed in 1999 and demolished in 2000.
Trump Marina (previously Trump Castle) is now the Golden Nugget, Atlantic City.

Oh, and the funniest solution ... proposing Trump as a national leader. Worth perhaps a quarter of what he's publicly claimed, Trump has a trail of bad business behind him that suggests every third decision or so will be troublesome.  Nobody cares when it's just his money on the table, but giving him the leadership position for the nation, now that's funny.

It's more fun to give than to receive

More fun?
That's not what the preacher said!  He said 'more blessed', the two-syllable version, bless-ed.  Okay, 'blessed' is one of those religionized words that blurs into nothing from overuse.  'Satisfying' is maybe a better choice, or 'happier'.


The word 'give' is equally blurry in modern use. The way it was originally said, it wasn't about giving gifts.  Here's the context.

Before leaving folks he loved for the last time, Paul encouraged them saying, “I’ve never had any taste for wealth or fashion, as you know. With these hands I took care of my own basic needs and those who worked with me. In everything I’ve done, I have demonstrated to you how necessary it is to work on behalf of the weak and not exploit them. You’ll not likely go wrong here if you keep remembering that our Master said, ‘You’re far happier giving than getting.’”

Then Paul went down on his knees, all of them kneeling with him, and prayed. And then a river of tears. Much clinging to Paul, not wanting to let him go. 

Acts 20

In the moment described, we see loving friends bidding goodbye to their brother, and he encourages them as he goes.  Love and help each other through life, you'll be happier that way, all of you.

The Price of Civil·(human)·ization

• Should the wealthy be taxed more than the poor?
• Should benefit programs favor the lower income group?
• Should a retiree who has paid little into Social Security get a larger percentage return on what they've paid?
• Should low wage earners be subsidised for living expenses?

The math is simple.
If I earn and save, I should be able to keep it all.  If I work diligently and deserve the income I receive, I earned it, nobody else did.  That's the common conservative position, and it's a valid start point.

The one who works, earns, and saves does in fact deserve the return of their labor, of their disciplined thrift and saving.

The story gets a bit more complex when you consider how they arrived at that place of success.  None succeed without help along the way.  Opportunity isn't equal despite our efforts.  Some get the good education, the good employment opportunity, the safe neighborhood where they can enjoy a quiet evening while they do their homework.  Some manage to get through college, scrabbling for enough to live while they do it.  Others make their way into a trade and develop skills that are in demand.  They have a way forward.

Others try just as hard, but the door doesn't open.  Some live where they can afford to, often in troublesome neighborhoods with street crime and violence.  School work suffers when parental supervision is limited by multiple jobs or a missing spouse.  Childhood development suffers when the top influence is a gang culture. Or poverty.  No one chooses to be poor, to not have enough for a healthy diet or a decent education.

Helping those in need -- the underlying principle is recognition of fairness, of equity.  None of us get to choose where or when we're born, the cultural and economic circumstances in which we are raised, yet our humanity requires of us that we care for one another, and that means freely receiving and giving help.

Difficulties can arise when help becomes an impersonal program rather than a personal offer.  Programs can lack the elements of brotherhood and encouragement, and they can produce less than impressive results.  The one helped doesn't get the friend walking alongside that they need and that could be such a help.

That said, do those in need deserve help?  Of course.  The larger question, are those who've accumulated wealth obligated to help others?

It's not about being nice, it's the larger issue of doing what is right.  Is that true?
(Ever wonder why we have wheelchair ramps?  It's not because we're being nice.)

In the marketplace, each echelon is built on the backs of those below. That's the way money works.  It's a bit nonsensical to suggest that the wealth of some didn't come from the efforts of others.

Interestingly, if you take wealth out of the model, the pyramid collapses, and people quickly become the same in every aspect.








__________________________________________________________
Now consider American Capitalism and American Socialism.
Or perhaps The 'Why' of In-group Thinking

Temporary Insanity - the Teen Years

Teens are nuts occasionally, at least according to parental reports.    Is there a cure?

Over coffee at work, my friend tells me about her young daughter.  She'd had a meltdown when told to add a clothing item to what she was wearing.  The rule was about tights (jeggings?) being worn with a skirt; it's Mom's standard for propriety.  When the youngster was reminded of the requirement, she exploded in profuse tears, began throwing clothing out of her closet and around her room, wailing, "I don't have anything to wear!" She's ten years old.

Two things worth our notice.
First.  The transition to adulthood is underway in the pre-teen years -- and it opens up an unknown realm for the emerging person.  Never having done it before, you now want to categorize and orchestrate the parts of life yourself. Difficulties emerge with the discovery that everything is of absolute maximum importance!  E.g., "I can't find my socks! My life is over!"

It takes a few years for a youngster to sort out what's important and what's not, what deserves a fifteen second discussion and what deserves a few days of deliberation.  Youthful inexperience can lead to tantrum events where unimportant details get undeserved attention.  (Data tags still needed: priority, precedence, significance, relevance, context, granularity, and so on.)

Second.  Okay, the second thing is that kids begin learning the process of discussion and negotiation long before their own verbal skills are fully developed.*  They hear adult conversation and acquire huge chunks of information about how to make a point or get a result.  It's just pieces of life skill they notice and file away without any deliberation or evaluation.

Analysis:

Cause: kids in transition are learning to be adults, managing the details of life, but everything is super-important until they learn otherwise.

Cure: demonstrate and teach the skills of negotiation and good manners.  Do it deliberately, beginning in the very early years, and compliment them when they get it right.  Please and thank you, "Mother, may I?", "Would it be ok if...?"; all of that is the 'how' of dealing with things.  When a mega-boom happens, de-escalate.  Talk it through calmly in practical terms of importance and problem solving.

Safety Note:  avoid escalation, anger, and the power play.  They separate the participants and make matters worse by lessening your access to your child's learning process.  On the other side, getting it right can be an extraordinarily positive experience for parent and child and bring them closer.  A quick review of how mom and dad handle life details might be helpful.

The young mom telling me about her ten-year-old (above) was laughing at how bizarrely difficult it is to be a parent. Mom is a professional, accustomed to problem solving and decision making, but she notes that kids don't come with an instruction manual.  Fortunately, Grandma was around that morning to lend a hand.  A few minutes after she left for work, Mom got a text from Grandma, "She had five pieces of toast.  Everything is fine now.  P.S. You need bread."

There's lots of fun along the way.  The ten-year old girl mentioned has an older brother who spends hours on the phone with his friends discussing relationships with girls, what to do, what it means when she says this or that, and how to impress, giving each other advice.  He's twelve. Giving each other advice!  But that's another story.

*An eighteen-month old toddler was playing on the floor while her mom and dad and friends chatted about travel pictures scrolling by on the wall screen, places they'd been and things they'd seen.  When Mom used the term "travel pictures", the toddler began walking around and waving her hands with a big smile saying excitedly, "I traveling, I traveling!"  Small children enjoy listening to adult conversation, and they grasp much more than you might expect.

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